Fun with Farts

Warning: This blog does discuss the fact that girls do fart, if that is uncomfortable to you please skip to previous or next blog.

I feel like I should get the dick and fart jokes away and done with at the beginning. Since my first blog was about the male genitalia this second one is about a very special and dear story about how we both started farting in front of each other. Long ago, in the first months of courtship, we were still trying to impress each other, mainly by trying not to be as disgusting as we really are. After two months of not releasing any toots in front of my new comedian boyfriend and spending almost 24/7 with each other, I thought I might explode. My stomach pain was so bad that AJ thought I might be with child or worse (I know what could be worse right?) Thank god one of my best friends was getting married in New Orleans and AJ could not go. As soon as I got to the hotel I unleashed the most horrid demon in the bathroom which promptly inspired my friend to call AJ and tell him that we should take the next step in our relationship and start being honest with each other. That's all the permission he needed. I get home, its night time, the winter winds whipping outside our window as we snuggle under the thick blankets, AJ holds me close slowly pulling the covers over my head and whispers in my ear “drink me in”. I'm not sure what he is doing, mistaking him for being sweet and snugly I let him hold me closer. The violation of my body and nose especially I would not wish upon my worst enemy. The fart made the leaded paint of our bedroom run in cancer causing terror. Its unfortunate I can never get him back because...of course my farts don't stink.